The Peace Widow

The Peace Widow

Recently I saw one of my regular patients. She was a smart lady in her early-forties. She was telling me that she has a lot of fun on the weekends when she looks after her one year old grandson. She told me that her husband has to fend for himself when she is busy with her grandson. I replied that he should not mind as it is his grandson too. He does not mind, she said, but he is technically the step grandfather. The grandson was from her son from her first husband.

Does your ex-husband get to spend time with his grandson too, I asked? She was quiet for a while, then said “no, he is dead”. I was taken aback, and said that I was very sorry to hear that and asked “when did he die”?

He was killed in Northern Iraq in 1994 she replied. I thought for a minute, then asked “but the first Iraq war ended in 1991, how was he killed in 1994. She then told me the story of the “Black Hawk Shoot Down” incident.

The 1994 Black Hawk Incident was a friendly fire incident over northern Iraq that occurred on 14 April 1994 during Operation Provide Comfort. This was an attempt to establish a no-fly zone over Northern Iraq. The United States Air Force was trying to protect Kurdish civilians from Saddam Hussein’s Air Force. 

The pilots of two United States Air Force F-15 fighter aircraft operating under the control of an airborne warning and control system (AWACS) aircraft, misidentified two United States Army Black Hawk helicopters as Iraqi Mi-24 "Hind" helicopters. The F-15 pilots fired on and destroyed both helicopters, killing all 26 military and civilians aboard, including personnel from the United States, United Kingdom, France, Turkey, and the Kurdish community.

My patient’s husband was 22 years old and was in one of those helicopters. He was one of those 26 people that were killed. Apparently, the AWACS operator had been told of the presence of the two friendly helicopters, but he failed to make a note this. Subsequently, when the F-15 pilots requested the AWACS for identification of these helicopters, they were unable to do so. The F-15 pilots were required to fly close by to see the helicopters visually. They misidentified them as Iraqi, despite two large American flags painted on each side of the Black Hawks.

The only person ever court martialed for this incident was the AWACS operator, and he was not punished. My patient became a very young widow with a new born baby son. The Army later gave my patient videos of the whole shoot down incident. The rear helicopter was shot down first. Her husband was in the lead helicopter and she saw it take evasive action to avoid being shot down, but the missile still hit it. She saw it go down in flames with her husband inside.

My patient was devastated after this. The Army gave her full benefits as a widow of a soldier killed in action, but no other compensation. The families of the foreigners killed in this incident were given $100,000 each as compensation by the United States department of defense.

My patient devoted her life to bringing up her son. She said that there were many men who expressed an interest in her, but she turned them all down. Her son grew up and got married and had a son of his own. This was the grandson that my patient was spending her weekends with.

Twenty years after she became a widow, my patient was in her forties. She then met a wonderful man. He had the same first name as her deceased husband. She fell in love and finally decided to get married. As soon as she got married, the military took away all her widow benefits. She is however content with her life today.

While I was happy that my patient had finally been able to move on with her life, I felt sad as to the circumstances of her becoming a widow. Even though her husband was killed in action, there was no war going at that time. He was also killed by his own side, in a ‘friendly fire’ incident. Most inappropriate to call it that because there is nothing ‘friendly’ about being fired on, no matter by whom.

Women who lose their husbands in war are often called ‘war widows’. In my patient’s case I felt it more appropriate to call her a “peace widow”. However, she is now no longer a widow, and I hope she continues to do well and finds ever more peace and happiness.

                                      The remains of the 26 victims of the Black Hawk 

                                      shootdown arrive at the U.S. Army Mortuary Center.